This is my favorite Halloween story, which I post every year at this time. (Its companion piece will be posted tomorrow.)
Happy Halloween, folks.
xo, Amy
Gene was washing the dishes when he heard someone at the door.
A kid dressed as a wizard held out a pillowcase. “Tricker treat.”
Halloween already? Gene didn’t have any candy in the house. “Just a second. Be right back.”
He closed the door most of the way and looked around quickly. No candy, of course. There were some apples on the counter, but the kid’s parents would think he put razor blades in them. Damn. On impulse Gene picked up something and returned to the door.
“Here you go. Happy Halloween.”
The kid stared. “What is it?”
“A waffle iron.”
The kid looked dubious.
“This is better than candy. You can make your own waffles, all year round.”
“Really?”
“Sure.” Gene couldn’t remember if the damn thing worked. He hadn’t used it in years.
“Okay. Thanks.” The wizard walked to the house next door.
Jesus. Time to go buy some candy. Gene went to his dresser and looked in his wallet. Twenty bucks, and that had to last him till Wednesday. Shit.
Knock, knock, knock.
Gene grabbed a few random items from the dresser and went to the door. Good thing, too, because it was a group this time.
“Here you go, everybody. Happy Halloween.”
A girl in a Tinkerbell costume made a face. “Speed Stick?!”
“Oops! Let me have that.” Gene took back the deodorant and gave her an old deck of cards instead.
A Mighty Morphin Power Ranger took issue. “I want candy.”
“You’ll have to settle for this watch.”
“Cool! Does it work?”
It didn’t. “Batteries not included.”
The Power Ranger didn’t seem to mind.
A punk rocker accepted the remote control to a DVD player Gene no longer owned without comment.
Gene closed the door and tried to think. He couldn’t just give away everything he owned. What on earth did he have to give out this year?
He went back to the kitchen. Maybe he’d stashed a Snickers bar in the fridge. Gene opened the refrigerator door. The opening notes of Also Sprach Zarathustra thundered around him. He took the carton and set it beside the door.
Back to the linen closet. The box was still there, unopened. Thank God he’d started buying in bulk. He settled himself in a chair near the door and waited for the fun to begin. He had beside him a carton of thirty-six eggs and a box of one hundred shaving cream samples.
Gene was gonna be the coolest guy on the block.
Copyright 2007 Amy Frushour Kelly. All rights reserved.
Reproduction by any means prohibited without prior written consent.