Linnea was to organization what Madame Curie was to the Plague.  Her inability to maintain any sort of order was a constant source of frustration, not just on her desk, but in most areas of her daily life.  It could be worse, of course – at least she was a good mother, a loving wife.  There was that to be grateful for.  Unfortunately, being a good parent didn’t mitigate the fact that she couldn’t unpack groceries without accidentally putting the toilet paper in the refrigerator or the eggs in the sink. 

The irony, she reflected, was that she was an expert at comprehending people.  As a child – perhaps as a compensating mechanism – she’d created her own system of classification for the people in her life, based on their personalities, relationship to herself, and function in everyday life.  Her husband, Steve, had his own label, as did practically everyone else in her life: Stephen Arthur Hodge, Husband, Father, Architect; soccer enthusiast, motorcycle enthusiast; tolerant of messy sock drawers, intolerant of wrinkled shirts, rather disorganized himself, not much of a reader.  There was a longer, more detailed nomenclature for Steve, but this one was useful for day-to-day stuff in Linnea’s head.  The system of classification was in a constant state of revision, of course, but she had an excellent memory and the advantage of being used to identifying people this way.  And while ordering everyone in this manner was somewhat reductive, it served its purpose.  If it were not for her inner taxonomy, Linnea would certainly be completely unable to function.

Sadly, Linnea didn’t realize that her daughter needed a corollary label until she saw her gaily skipping along beside the shopping cart in the grocery store parking lot, swinging the plastic bag around in circles and figure eights. 

Shaking her head at resultant mess on the asphalt, she made a mental note: “Stephanie Ursula Hodge: not to be trusted with eggs.”

“Oops,” said Stephanie.

Copyright 2004-2006 Amy Frushour Kelly. All rights reserved. Reproduction by any means prohibited without prior written consent.